Struggle and the Energy of Change – Part IV


We’ve been talking about the energy of struggle and its hidden and not-so-hidden impact in our lives.  Struggle has been part of our individual and collective experiences since the beginning of life here on this planet.

Yet the energy of struggle is one that keeps us stuck, in pain and fearful about the future.  It brings great resistance to the energy, even the thought, of change and our ability to simply let go and move forward.

In a recent session with a client, I was shown just how deep the fear of change is for almost everyone – and what is lurking underneath change and fueling that deep fear and

resistance.  I have to admit it shocked me!

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard clients say, “I just hate change!  I don’t do change well.”

When I’ve asked why, people have responded with, “I feel like if I make a change, it won’t be the right one – and then what will happen?”  Or, “If I make the necessary changes, am I really up to the challenge?  Am I good enough/smart enough/talented enough to handle it?”

People question whether they will be a success or a failure. (Both of those fears bring their own flavor of anxiety.)   They often wonder if the changes will even make a difference.  They are concerned that the little they already have might be taken away and then they’ll be left with nothing at all, if they make changes.

hope love dream faith trustWe can live with the devil we know, because we’ve been doing it.  But we’re not so sure that the devil we don’t know is any better.

What was revealed to me during that client’s session, is the deep distrust that things will actually change.  The resistance to change is about mistrusting that God or the Universe – or even you! – has your best interests at heart.

We feel that we’ve been lied to.  That the more we’ve changed, the more things stay the same.  We’ve put our trust in ourselves, in various gurus, or the church, or the system, or ourselves, and when we don’t see measurable results, we feel betrayed!  We’ve put our faith in something bigger than ourselves and we feel we’ve been let down and betrayed because the results have not met our expectations.

That betrayal seems to be the key to the resistance in feeling comfortable to make any changes.  And yet, we know we cannot stay where we’re at, because it’s not working and it’s just too painful.  And therein lies the biggest conundrum of all!

Pain, or even more pain because of betrayal. Whew! What a choice!

But what if circumstances and the energy of this new paradigm will now support your changes?

What if you can excavate the energy and the pain of past failures, betrayals and shattered dreams, to find the hidden treasure chest of what can be cleared and released, so that the new, higher energies available to us can actually support our dreams and desires?

time for change

How cool would THAT be??

One of the biggest keys to change is taking the time and effort to look within yourself, to dig deep, and discover what disappointments, fears, betrayals and damage happened as other choices you made resulted in less-than-stellar results.

Then you have the opportunity to release that old energy so that you have a clean slate from which to create.  Use the Quantum Soul Clearing Process™ to clear anything that you find.  Make sure you clear the energy of struggle and how it pertains to change.  Use your own wording, or use that phrase, which ever feels more relevant.

Once the clearing work is completed around your particular area of change and struggle, then you can re-examine the changes that you feel you need to make.  Does it feel like you have more options for change?  Can you see a clearer path to reach your objectives?  Can you accomplish your goals with just a small tweak – or do you need to make even greater changes?  Can you feel how much easier it feels to make those changes?  Everything looks different after you do your clearing work.

You can do this.  I believe in you.  And if you need extra help, I’m here to help.

In fact, between now and May 5th, I’m offering a spring special on private session work.  All private session packages are 25% off!  Send us an email to to start the process, and book your complimentary discovery session.

Here’s to releasing struggle and being able to make changes much more easily!


Are You Programmed to HAVE to Struggle – Part III

bigstock-Young-Stress-Woman-5137388-275x183March’s theme was all about the hidden – and not so hidden – program of “I have to struggle.” I even did a training on struggle and how it shows up in our lives – and particularly in our finances.

This month I am going to take this conversation even deeper. I believe that from the beginning of life on this planet we’ve been programmed to struggle for food, for survival, for shelter – for just about everything. This program has been passed down from generation to generation from the beginning of time! It’s like an insidious virus that undermines every facet of our lives.

Even our sacred scriptures reference this subject. Adam and Eve’s “fall from grace” resulted in their bodies changing from Light-Beings to being removed from the Garden of Eden and required to toil and work hard. Even their children suffered from this curse and fall and were no longer allowed to live in the garden with God.

Science also nurtures this theme through “survival of the fittest.” That the weak are eaten by the strong. Observers of nature watch and interpret the seeds of plants as they struggle through the layers of soil to reach the sunlight, where they then have to struggle to get enough water, nutrients and sunlight to survive.

Butterflies appear to struggle to emerge from the cocoon and hatchling chicks struggle to peck through their shells. That is what we’ve been taught – that there is struggle for survival everywhere!

But what if we’ve gotten it all wrong?

What if the butterfly and the chick aren’t really struggling? What if from their perspective they are simply awakening and stretching? What if it is a game and is fun? What if that process is strengthening their bodies and their connection to Source? What if that process isn’t really struggle at all – but merely a joyous breakthrough!? A stepping into their greatness and infinite potential?

Monarch ButterflyWhat if the seeds and sprouts can’t WAIT to stretch and grow and become part of the greater eco-system, to add their light and their color and breath into the world? What if each first spear of growth that emerges from the dirt is filled with the joy, the exuberance, and the knowledge of what they are here to do and are so busy getting to it, that they experience only deep pleasure, and deep connection to both the earth and they heavens? They don’t have time to struggle – they are too busy enjoying life!

What if everything we’ve perceived as struggle in our own lives is simply an old program that no longer serves us? We are burgeoning, joyous, Light-filled Beings housed by these physical bodies and our Divine state knows no struggle – only BEING! Is it possible that we’ve gotten struggle all wrong? That’s it’s not something to be avoided at all costs? That we don’t have to have all the stress and fuss and chaos and pain in order transform and grow? What if we can easily release the old paradigm of struggle altogether?

Imagine what your life would look like if you could view struggle from a completely different perspective. Instead of dreading what appears to be hard and insurmountable, that circumstance or event is, instead, an opportunity to become stronger and healthier. More deeply connected to your innate, Divine co-creative skills. That it is an opportunity to learn more about your incredible strength, your strength of character, and your resourcefulness.

What if you could just perceive struggle as an exhilarating game of skill and mastery?

What if you could simply learn to LOVE struggle, so that is was no longer struggle but something else entirely?

Take a few minutes and write down all the beliefs you have about struggle. Life is hard. Life is unfair. Life sucks. People suck. It’s so hard to make ends meet. The world is an unfriendly place. It’s hard to move my body because I’m in so much pain…. The list is probably quite long. But sit down for a bit and pull up all your limiting beliefs about the world that involve struggle.

I’m giving you permission to dive deeply into the pool of negativity. You can always get back out, clean yourself off and feel better. It’s important to acknowledge all that “shtuff” so that you know where you’re at. REMEMBER NO JUDGMENT! Simply acknowledge that this “shtuff” is in there. And most of it probably isn’t even yours!

We’ve been told not to go into the negativity. To stay only in the positive, because we are constantly creating what we are thinking and feeling. (Heck, I’ve even told you that in the past!)

But what I’ve found is that you can’t get to where you want to be until you know where you’re at! It’s the first rule in using maps. And what you’re creating is a map of hidden beliefs that has led you down one side-road after another, rather than where you’ve wanted to go.

So what if where you are at is with a list of 10,000 negative beliefs! That just means you don’t have 10,001 negative beliefs. That’s something to be grateful for. It’s a great starting point! But seriously, you have the Quantum Soul Clearing Process that you can use to chop up this list and make mince-meat out of it. You have all kinds of transformational tools in your tool kit to get your from where you are (again NO judgment!) to where you want to be.

Consider it a game or fun challenge to see how many you can work through each day. Think about it as the most delicious journey of the soul and when you get through that list, you will have become an ascended master of your existence! Better yet, think of it as a joyous stretching of your emotional, mental and spiritual muscles that will make you strong and healthy and whole. Isn’t that worth it?

Imagine yourself facing what might appear to be adversity with a grin on your face and joy in your heart, and a willingness to roll up your sleeves and PLAY! Isn’t that better, knowing that you get to choose whether it’s really hard or not, instead of that horrible feeling of dread when you think about struggle now? How different would your life experiences be from that place of powerful choice?

There’s nothing more exhilarating than solving a puzzle or winning! Eliminating struggle is how can you make your life a complete “Win” each and every day.

So what will you choose?

Are You Programmed to HAVE to Struggle?

Struggle-Hands-Holding-On-SmallI’ve had a lot of time to contemplate life – my life and life in general – since my surgery on January 14th. And one of the things that I started really thinking about is how life can be a struggle.

If you’ve followed me for very long, you know I believe that we can heal from just about anything. And I have. But my dogged determination that I could heal this thing by myself actually got me in to quite a fix! Ultimately that stubborn focus created even greater struggle in my life.

By the time I’d finally contacted my surgeon and got in to see him, I was barely able to walk from one end of my home to the other – and I required a walker to do it. In fact, the damage was so extensive, my right leg was more than two inches shorter than my left! Yikes!

In retrospect that was more than determination, it was really about stubborn disregard for the facts, and turning a blind eye to my own care and well-being. Exactly the opposite of what I teach! (Yes, I see the incongruence there, believe me!)

Thanks to my monthly membership group, I realized it was also a subconscious program of HAVING to struggle. The brilliant members of my group and I started to dig into the universal belief that at our core, we are programmed to HAVE to struggle – even if there might be an easier way.

The fact was that I needed help. Outside medical, western medicine help. (There, I admitted it!) And thank GOD that it was available! 100 years ago, I would have had to just live in excruciating pain and suffering – and utter disability. Struggling every day. Not a pretty picture, to say the least!

In the dictionary, struggle is defined as:

  1. to contend with an adversary or opposing force.
  2. to contend resolutely with a task, problem, etc.; strive: to struggle for existence.
  3. to advance with violent effort: to struggle through the snow.
  4. to make one’s way with violent effort.

Obviously, struggle is the opposite of ease, flow and grace. When we are struggling, we are disconnected from the flow of the divine. We are forcing a certain agenda in our lives for a specific outcome and not allowing new opportunities for healing and transformation into our lives. Additionally there is a component of violence that is just opposite our desires for happiness and well-being.

So what does struggle look like in your life? Are you even aware that you are struggling? I wasn’t! To me it looked like focused determination to overcome physical pain. (OK – so that is struggling!)

Do you have to struggle to make ends meet every month? Do you struggle with your weight? Do you struggle to make a relationship work? Do you struggle with guilt, shame, overwhelm, addiction, self-loathing, jealousy, etc? What is your unique flavor of having to struggle?

14991655_sWhat do you get from having to struggle? Are you like me, feeling triumphant when you hurtled huge obstacles? Is there an addiction to being triumphant?

Since our last group coaching session, I’ve become much more cognizant of what struggle really looks like. How hidden programs of struggle – HAVING to struggle, to be exact – have been sabotaging my personal happiness, health and wellbeing. Even my finances! It’s almost like an addiction to overcoming obstacles!

In my mind’s eye, I allowed myself to go back through my own life, recalling family stories of struggle and having to overcome big hurdles. I’ve been looking at the news and societal issues. And I’ve been astonished at just HOW MUCH we all believe we need to struggle, rather than allow good into our lives.

In a meditation, I got to see how, from the beginning of life on this planet, we have been programmed to struggle. For food, for existence, for shelter, for our country, for our RIGHTS (that’s a big one!), for our ability to be ourselves.

Over the next weeks, I will be exploring and writing more about this all-consuming subject. I want to challenge you to begin examining your own life and observing how struggle might be impacting you. Start to journal about it. And start doing the Quantum Soul Clearing Process when you find struggle programs that are sabotaging your best efforts for success.

You might also consider joining my monthly membership program to help you explore and release these powerful, hidden determinants to your happiness, wholeness and success. You can learn more about the group membership program here:

I would love to hear from you! Let me know what types of struggles you are observing in your life and how much time, energy and life-force you are spending just dealing with the struggle. What and how are you not allowing more ease into your life? Let’s release this energy and co-create something much more life-enhancing!

Here’s to a life of greater freedom, ease, flow and grace!

The Magic of Christmas: What do those words bring to mind?

23536819_sFor me it is the wonder and the anticipation of miracles, large and small, that happen.  It is the beauty of the music, the lights, and the frequencies of good will and kindness that permeates the air at this time of year.  It’s good food and the warmth of family and friends.

For me, the magic of Christmas evokes a tale I heard from my grandfather who was a veteran of WWI.  I remember a Christmas where, he told me the story of a miracle that he experienced in the middle of a war-torn country.

There had been hard fighting between the Germans and the English and Americans.  Many men died on the battle field and in the trenches.  The landscape was stark, barren and pock-marked by craters caused by artillery shells.  At dark, on Christmas Eve, a cease fire was called, and the wounded and dead were retrieved from the no-man’s land between the embattled soldiers trenches.

And then, from the German trenches, a single voice could be heard, “Silent Night, Holy Night…”  One voice after another – from both sides – joined in that sacred song from both sides of the battlefield.  A white flag was raised on each side.  Soon men were emerging from their trenches and making their way across the battlefield to shake the hands of their bitter enemies they had been shooting at just hours earlier.  An unofficial cease-fired was  reached for just a few hours between battle-weary soldiers who chose to honor the season of peace, love and light – even in the midst of a terrible war.

Each time I hear the peaceful hymn of Silent Night, I cannot help but think of that story and the miracle of a cease fire for a whole day, as sworn enemies laid down their weapons, shook hands, and allowed in the energy and compassion that represents the message of Christmas:  peace, good will, love, and hope of a new day.

miracles-just-aheadWhat miracle are you expecting this year?  What magic is trying to show itself in your life?  Are you open to seeing and experiencing these Spirit-filled events?  Can you – will you –  allow yourself to receive and experience the precious gifts of time and of being present to the wonder of this season so you can see all the miracles that are unfolding around you?  And how can you perhaps ignite a small miracle for someone?

Try taking some time each day to really look around you.  Notice the people around you.  See them with the fresh eyes of a child.  Perhaps you might discover someone who could use a kind word, an unexpected cup of coffee, or a tiny, surprise token to brighten their world.

What random act of kindness can you give as your miracle to the world this month?  It doesn’t have to cost much, if anything.  It can be the miracle of your smile.  A compliment to a stranger, an unexpected gift for a child.  It could be the gift of your time and money to a shelter, food pantry or soup kitchen.  There is plenty of need in this world that can be allayed by some form of giving.

Some of the magic of the season, I think, is in the giving.  The energy, the frequency of giving, paves the way for receiving.  What are you willing to allow and receive?  More love, more kindness, more self-expression, more financial abundance, more of everything?

There is something just so delicious about the anticipation of something joyful and perhaps a bit mystical that is awaiting us just around the corner.  It is an expectation that anything is possible and in that expectation, the Universe is willing to step up and deliver!

Let’s really connect and play in that expectant anticipation and magic of the Christmas Season starting right now.

Wishing you and your family great joy, peace, vibrant health, infinite prosperity, and a very Merry Christmas!

The High Cost of Hidden Low Self-Worth and Self-Esteem Programs Part 2

Earlier this month we began the discussion of what hidden low self-worth and low self-esteem programs are and how they might be negatively impacting your health, wealth and relationships. We are going to be talking about this subject for the next couple of months, because I believe that this is the primary stumbling block to every type of success you desire! It is critically important!

I’d like to deepen that conversation today as we talk about the low self-worth program of “I’m Worthless,” and how it relates specifically to your finances, wealth and affluence.

worthless-bigstock-Graffiti-3329621The dictionary defines “worthless” as: Having no use, value or importance; good-for-nothing. Similar meanings are abandoned, baseless, barren, cheap, contemptible, despicable, inconsequential, inferior, pointless, nothing, trivial…. and the list goes on. You get the point.

This one TINY little low self-worth program, if running in the subconscious mind has the power to completely derail your financial well-being, not to mention the other parts of your life! In fact it could be costing you tens of thousands, if not millions of dollars throughout your life-time! What could you do with an extra million dollars or more??

Within our brains, we have synapses that create neural pathways of thought, feeling and action into our brains and our bodies. If we have a thought that get reinforced repeatedly, it creates stronger and stronger neural network connections. Literally, millions of brain cells and neural receptors fuse and wire together to create belief systems.

Just like any pathway that is created by countless feet walking in the same place, day after day on the earth; or little rivulets of water that create erosion patterns in the soil, our brains effectively do the same thing when we experience the same emotions over and over again. And just like in a torrential rain storm that creates deep streams and rivers in the landscape, our brains, when deluged with similar experiences and feelings over and over again also create deep, strong channels of electrical wiring within our neural cortexes.

Neurons that fire together wire together. That means that repeated negative feelings of shame, guilt, worthlessness, feeling like you’re contemptible, good-for-nothing, etc., create very strong bundled neural connections of low-self-worth in the brain that then become standard operating code in our lives. It becomes the “normal” frequency that we don’t consciously feel until we bump up against a person or circumstance that triggers that feeling – and then we become reactive.

If your belief system is (or has been) reinforced through early childhood traumas of bullying, punishment, constant criticism, being shamed, not measuring up to a standard, we come to the conclusion that we are worthless, deeply flawed, inferior, and a failure.

Blurred-motion-of-woman-runningFailure is a natural, normal part of life.  It is how we learn.  What doesn’t work – and what does. No child learns to walk without ever falling down hundreds of times over and over again.  Each fall could be classified a “failure to walk.”  However, we never label the child as a failure as a walker.  We know that falling down is part of the process of learning to walk.  Eventually the child not only walks but learns to run, climb, leap and skip!  That’s a powerful SUCCESS!

The belief that we are a failure as a human being is different. It is a judgment (often picked up or imprinted onto us from others!) that wreaks havoc on our ability to connect with and utilize our talents, our gifts, our abilities. It demolishes our trust and faith in ourselves – and ultimately impacts what we believe we are worth in the marketplace!

People who run this particular low self-worth program often go through life feeling anxious that they will be “found out” as a fraud, even though they are highly successful, talented, accomplished and charming. Inwardly, they feel secretly empty, fearful and hollow. They wonder why their many accomplishments leave them cold and rarely do they believe all the praise for their success, because they “know the truth” about who and what they “really are.”

Most people don’t know why they feel miserable and unhappy, because that underlying program is “normal.” It’s invisible because it’s always been there. But it continues to erode their joy, happiness, contentment, self-confidence and self-love. At the extreme, the belief of worthlessness may lead to self-harm, self-destructive behaviors, addictions, or suicide. But most often it is expressed as nagging feelings of anxiousness, or feeling somehow inadequate – not quite measuring up.

Here are just some of the ways that the “I’m Worthless” Low Self-Worth Program impacts you in the business world and marketplace:

  • You continually under-value and under-price your services.
  • You charge a fraction of what your competitors charge, knowing you are more effective than they are, but unable to raise your prices because it doesn’t seem “fair” somehow.
  • You don’t feel confident enough to ask for that well-deserved raise.
  • You may take on the work tasks of other team members to make you feel better about yourself. Then feel profoundly overwhelmed and resentful because you can’t get your own job accomplished.
  • You get volunteered for everything and cannot say “No!” even though your schedule is so jam-packed, sleep is often optional!
  • You don’t know how to delegate. Everything MUST be handled by you. Otherwise it won’t be “good enough” and you’ll just re-do it anyway.
  • You are anxious, exhausted, overwhelmed and profoundly unhappy, even though you appear to be highly successful and have it altogether.
  • You don’t feel like you can take a vacation because….(fill in the blank)
  • You not only don’t practice good self-care, you’re not really sure what that means.

This profound conversation of hidden low self-worth and low self-esteem is one of the most important topics of our lives. It is my belief that every block to success, money, healthy relationships and love is because of our hidden low self-worth programming.

I want to invite you to join me on Tuesday, July 30, 2013 for a free 90 minute call to explore this topic even further. I’m not selling anything on the call – it’s all pure content. This is about bringing deeper awareness and understanding to this extremely important issue that impacts us all at some level.

Click here to reserve your space.

Be sure to share this with your friends and family so that they can benefit as well. It’s that important!

Before the call, I’d love to hear from you. Let me know how you your life has been or might be impacted by hidden – or not-so hidden! – low self-worth programming. Email me at Share your story and let’s get this conversation going!

The REAL Cost of Low Self Worth and Self Esteem


Did you know that you might be harboring a hidden low self-worth or low self-esteem program within your subconscious mind that could be wreaking havoc in your life?

Do you know how much money low self-worth or low self-esteem has cost you financially?  It could be millions of dollars!

Ask yourself this:

  • How has low self-worth undermined or sabotaged your personal relationships?
  • Is low self-worth impacting your health and well-being?
  • Is it keeping you from reaching for a bigger, more expanded life experience?
  • Is it draining your pocketbook?
The dictionary describes worth as: Excellence of character or quality which commands high regard; of usefulness or importance to the world, to a person, or for a purpose; having value.

The definition of esteem is: To regard highly or favorably, regard with respect or admiration;  a favorable opinion or judgment; respect or regard.

Self-worth, or self-esteem, is how valuable, how useful or how important we see ourselves in the world.  It is a measure of ourselves, and our belief about our intrinsic worth.
Typically, we think of people who suffer from low self-worth or self-esteem as someone who is shy, withdrawn, and unwilling to put themselves forward.  We may envision them staying in the background, constantly yearning for something but are too afraid to ask.  And this is definitely one definition.

Interestingly, many people may not even know that they are suffering from low self-worth or self-esteem.  They may look and feel physically fit.  They may act confident at work.  They appear to be able to attract a mate.  They may be very outgoing and charismatic.  They may look like they have it all together and be on top of the world.  They may hold high positions of leadership in business, government, religion, or society.

But underneath everything, lurking in the background, is a sense that something is missing.  That there is something just beyond your grasp that might be even better.  It may manifest as a feeling of being unfulfilled. Of wanting or needing more – more money, a bigger and better home; the most flashy car; expensive jewelry and clothing; superior social status; constant companionship…something… in order to fill some yet undefined void.  However, that constant, ever-expanding need for more cannot be filled for long – and then the quest for something “even better” begins anew.

Some jokingly call it “shopping therapy.”  Others, call it what it really is: a shopping addiction.  But that good and powerful feeling that happens when you buy something you want never remains – and in order to keep that good feeling you keep buying and buying, whether you can really afford it or not.

Low self-worth or self-esteem is the basis for all addictions, whether it is drugs, alcohol, sex, food, spending, chaos, negativity, anger, etc.  It is all about trying to fill an unknown need in order to feel better, more worthy or important inside.
instrinsict worthDo you feel like you keep bumping up against an invisible financial glass ceiling that you just cannot break through?  You may have a self-worth program that says you’re not worth more than $75,000 per year.  It you manage to reach $100,000 one year, the next you might find yourself laid off for several months and only make $50,000 – or even less!

Low self-worth can keep you from asking for that raise you rightfully deserve.  It will keep you over-achieving and being under-paid for your services.  It will keep you from finishing that book or project that might just be your ticket to the fame and fortune you desire.  It might keep you from following your real dream to be a famous painter, rock star, healer, entrepreneur (fill in your own dream here!) because you are afraid you might fail or look foolish – or that people will talk about you and make fun of you.  

And so you rationalize away your dreams by taking a job that will pay the bills, that looks successful on the outside but that is sucking the life out of your soul each and every day.  You tell yourself that you are too old, too over-weight, not ready, don’t have enough education, blah, blah, blah….  And the years go by and the excuses keep coming as your dreams and goals slowly die – piece by painful piece. 

So what is the answer to the pervasive, and often unseen problem of low self-worth and self-esteem?  Can it ever be corrected?  How do you even know if there is a problem if you are not consciously aware that you don’t value yourself enough?

The answers begin with learning how to become more consciously aware of how our thoughts and actions make us feel.  By indentifying what we are really saying to ourselves and about ourselves every day.  Learning how we are our own harshest critic – and how that is literally robbing us of our financial abundance, joy and life-force.

It takes practice and it take constant diligence to monitor our thoughts, our actions, our feelings, and our outcomes!  But it IS possible! 
personal relationships
What I’ve discovered is that circumstance that we are experiencing in our lives is based on how much we love, respect and feel worthy about ourselves.  Everything!  If we have healthy self-worth, we expect more from the world – and we get it.  We take better care of ourselves on every level.  We only choose loving, healthy relationships, because we will not tolerate people who don’t love and support us at least as much as we love and support ourselves.  The key to everything we desire is all about this new conversation of real self-worth and self-esteem.

On July 30th, at 4:00 p.m. PT/ 5:00 p.m. MT/ 6:00 p.m. CT/ 7:00 p.m. ET I’m hosting a free 60-minute teleseminar to talk about ways that we can become more conscious of what our real self-worth and self-esteem levels are.  We will explore the many ways we unconsciously sabotage ourselves in different areas of our lives, based on the subconscious low self-worth programs that are at the root of our behaviors.  We will uncover some of the hidden words and phrases we use to undermine our true worth, and how we unconsciously train others to not value us.  And we will also discover how we can begin to love and value ourselves, so that others will too.  

I hope you will join me for this powerful event!  Here’s the link to sign up for this free event:

Memorial Day – Remembering the Past


Every year for as long as I can remember, my family had a tradition of honoring those who were no longer with us.  In the United States, Memorial Day is a national holiday as a remembrance of our fallen soldiers and those who served in all branches of the military.

I’ve always loved Memorial Day for many reasons.  As a child, it was the gateway to a care-free summer and no school!  It was a day of family, picnics, good food, and story-telling. It was a very special day where we would put together bouquets of flowers and go to each of the cemeteries where my grandparents, great grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins had been buried.  It was always an all-day ritual of driving to Ogden, Hooper, and West Weber cemeteries to place those flowers on each of their graves.  Everyone we knew was also out there – extended family, friends, co-workers, neighbors, etc.  It was a type of informal reunion where we’d connect and tell stories of our loved ones to keep their memories alive.

I heard the stories of my grandfather and his three brothers who all served in World War I.  My grandfather was in the first air corps and was a gunner.  His three brothers all served in the trenches.  I learned about World War II and my uncles’ and other relatives who fought and their stories.    I come from a long line of proud veterans and warriors who faithfully and proudly served our country, so memorial day has always been a very big tradition for us to honor those who served – as well as all who have fallen.

Here in Utah the cemeteries are simply beautiful.  On Memorial Day, acres of headstones are turned into acres of flowers, small windmills, patriotic flags, pictures, and all types of decorations.  They are a riot of color and lovingly placed mementos that are given in remembrance of loved ones.

But for me, I think the most magical thing was seeing all the spirits of those no longer with us shimmering throughout the cemeteries, mingling with all the gathered people, and communing with the living, as they shared the stories, good times, tears and laughter.

For me, it brought a feeling of continuity and a deep knowing that even though our bodies may die, the Spirit is eternal. I always felt great comfort and joy in the connections with the departed.  It never felt scary or eerie – just a bigger family reunion that most people just couldn’t see, but could often feel.

During those visits, I particularly loved to hear about my great grandparents and great-great grandparents who had helped settle the Ogden Valley.  Hearing about their trials, their journeys, their lives helped bring them closer to me.  It made me feel deeply connected with the past and gave me a sense of continuity and belonging that I didn’t often feel otherwise.

One story was of my great grandparents who emigrated from Norway in the 1870’s.  My great grandfather came to America with two other brothers.  He was a blacksmith by trade and a big, strong man.  He was here, working for over two years before he’d saved enough to send for my great grandmother and their three small children who he’d had to leave behind.

They originally bought a blacksmith shop in the upper Ogden Valley in Liberty, Utah.  It reminded them of the old country with the towering mountains, deep snows and hearty pine trees.  Life was very difficult and my great grandmother had three babies during the time they lived there that she lost, one after another.  Needless to say, she struggled with depression and feeling isolated.

Finally, my grandfather had an opportunity to buy a lucrative blacksmith shop in Riverdale, Utah, a small farming village (at that time) near Ogden, Utah.  It was a once-in-a-life-time opportunity for a much better, prosperous life with a larger community of people.  The only problem was that he didn’t have the required money to put down on the new shop and there were others who were waiting to step in and buy it.  He despaired ever being able to make that dream come true.

My great grandmother was only about 4’10” tall, but was a very strong, determined, intelligent, hard-working woman.  She asked him how important this dream of his was and they talked about it at length.  She finally took him into the bedroom where the cedar chest he’d made for her stood.  There, in the bottom, carefully saved and squirreled away, was layer upon layer of pennies, nickels and dimes.  Money she’d saved for years for an emergency or an opportunity.  There was just enough money for the down payment on the shop and the house that went with the deal.

Knowing the very humble beginnings of my family, this story always brought tears to my eyes.  It always seemed like a bit of a miracle.  But more than that, it spoke of my great grandmother’s love for her husband and her willingness to follow him to a new, foreign land, filled with hardship and loss, and still make all their dreams come true.

Some old stories, like this, connect us with the truth of our ancestors and help give us a deep sense of belonging.  They help us see the value of sacrifice or the bonds of deep, abiding love.

Other old stories, may not be so positive.

Often, when working with others privately or in group, we find that the old story of lack, limitation, grief, sadness, depression, poverty, or any other type of low-energy frequency, is the one thing that just keeps us stuck.  The old stories can be creating a resonant field that attracts more of exactly what we DON’T want to be experiencing!  It can be our biggest blind spot and it can be tripping us up over and over again, as we struggle to achieve our goals, dreams, and desires.

What is so interesting, is how these old stories are often a part of our every day conversations!  How often do you hear yourself argue for your limitations?  “I can’t afford that because (fill in the blank)!”  “My life just sucks because (fill in the blank)!”  “I can’t get a date to save my soul!”  “I’ve filled out thousands of resumes and no one wants me!”  “No matter what I do, I just can’t drop this extra weight!”  (Yes, I know that one intimately!  lol)

Our thoughts, our beliefs, the old stories we tell ourselves over and over and over again are sabotaging our best efforts to change our lives.  They keep the pain of the past alive and well, and rob us of our peace of mind and prosperity in the here and now, as well as the future!

These week, I want to challenge you to pay greater attention to your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs - especially to your words!  Begin to notice when you are saying something that keeps an old unwanted, disempowering belief – and old story of disempowerment –  in charge of your life.

Memories can be great – or they can be your biggest stumbling block.  How are you using the memories of your past?  Are there old stories you need to simply eliminate all-together? What if you could tell those stories  in a different way that will allow you to tell the new story of prosperity, self-love, joy, empowerment and alignment with who YOU REALLY are!?

Let’s work together to change the story.  To align with the magnificence of who you truly are.  Allow yourself to tell the story of the beautiful, engaging, powerful, brilliant, gifted you.  Dare to remember the past in a way that allows you to learn from it and move forward in freedom and joy, eager to embrace your creations and co-creations with others – to create this new paradigm world the way you want to experience it!