Are You Programmed to HAVE to Struggle

Earlier this month I introduced the hidden program of “I have to struggle.” This insidious, pervasive, unseen program is often at the root of much of our personal pain.

I want to explore this unconscious belief that you have to struggle, how you can begin to recognize it and remove it. This is so important, because almost every human being has this disempowering program running in the background, and very few are aware of just how impactful it is!

But most of all, I want to help you understand just how intricately woven it is into almost every aspect of your life so that you can become conscious of it and nip it in the bud. I believe you can begin to eliminate struggle as a core operating system in your life. It is through clarity that you create freedom and can reinvent and re-create your life.

This week, I want to take a peek into how struggle is impacting your money. Let’s look at some of the ways the hidden programs of struggle.

There are millions of people who struggle every day just for survival. They work in low-paying jobs that they hate. They work long hours and can barely make ends meet. Millions of people and families are one or two paychecks away from homelessness and they worry how they will buy groceries and keep the utilities on.

I’ve been there personally, too. Looking back, I remember the shame I felt about my working situations and the terror that was a constant companion. I was a single mom with two teenage children. I was barely recovering from being bed-ridden for two years with crippling rheumatoid arthritis, when I decided I could no longer remain in a broken marriage. I had no job and was on disability, and knew that I’d never make it on the minimal money I had coming in.

I knew I had to do something – and quick. I’d love to tell you that the next day I found a pot of money and I lived happily ever after, but that would be a lie. Instead, I did what everyone running struggle programming does: I found a low-paying job that barely kept a roof over my family’s head and was physically difficult for me to perform!

The program of struggle kept me in survival mode. I was constantly in lack financially, and my body was under a great deal of stress. I knew I wasn’t well-suited to the job, but figured “beggars can’t be choosers!” (Hint: That’s another struggle program!)

That job was filled with struggle – long hours in the sun, climbing up and down hills, while my body was still beginning to recover, and trying to learn entire new computer systems and a whole new set of job skills! However, it also got me back into the work force, and gave me the confidence to look for other work that was more financially rewarding and more suited to my abilities.

My next job working in the telecommunications industry was almost three times the salary as my previous position. But I still hadn’t resolved the underlying belief of struggle. So I manifested a slave-driver as a boss and a company that viewed their employees as disposable resources that could be used up and thrown out at any time. My stress levels were off the charts!

Because of the extreme stress, my health began to suffer again. I would wake up in a cold sweat and sheer panic at 2 a.m. every night wondering how I was going to keep my job and raise my kids. I was short tempered and controlling at home because I was exhausted and my body was in a lot of pain. I didn’t know any better way to cope.

Ultimately, I got some counseling and learned new ways of lowering my stress levels. As my stress levels came down, my pain levels also went down and I felt like I began to thrive. And still I didn’t recognize just how ingrained the program of “I have to struggle” was in every facet of my life. But I had learned how to cope more efficiently.

Perhaps you can relate to this scenario. Or perhaps you have your own unique way of believing you have to struggle.

It has taken me years to discover this hidden program and I’d like to help you find a shortcut to eliminate this destructive program if possible. I believe it is truly at the root of much of our pain and suffering.

So what how does the program of struggle show up in your life? What does it look like? Are you even aware that you’re struggling. Most people have a sense that they do struggle at some level, but aren’t aware of how all-encompassing it is.

Here are some things to think about as you explore this program more deeply:

Do you procrastinate and put things off until you are in crisis?
Do you find yourself having challenge after challenge after challenge?
If so, do you feel triumphant after you’ve overcome each obstacle only to have something else pop up soon? (Hint: This can also be tied into an addiction of triumphing. Using conflict and challenges to create an emotional and spiritual high.)
How often do you feel like you have to rob “Peter to pay Paul” throughout the month?
When was the last time you felt like you could breathe deeply and relax because things were going to be OK?
Do you experience having an abundance of money only to find that the hot water heater goes out or that the car needs to be fixed – and there goes that extra abundance?
Do you find yourself kvetching about how bad traffic was on the way to work?
Is your attitude on the darker side – feeling pessimistic about life in general and some things in particular?
Are you at odds or in active conflict with your family, friends, or co-workers?
Do you make a big deal out of 1st World problems – your food didn’t come fast enough, your cell phone service dropped your call again, you just can’t find anything to wear in your already full closet, etc.?
Is everything generally good in your life, but you’re still not satisfied or happy?
Do you feel tense and irritable more often than not?

These are just a few of the ways that we can identify whether we are actively running the hidden program of “I have to struggle” in our lives.

Now, to be clear, not everything goes smoothly every day. That would be unrealistic. And everyone is entitled feel their feelings when something doesn’t go according to expectations! That’s normal. There’s nothing wrong with truly feeling your feelings. In fact, it is IMPERATIVE that you feel them clearly, deeply and strongly! Because feelings are the soul’s way of speaking to you.

But how you react to the things that show up in your life will give you big clues as how much this program of struggling is affecting you. “Having to struggle” programming makes us feel disconnected, anxious, unworthy and overwhelmed. Wouldn’t you like to feel better? Did you know that you DON’T have to struggle? Did you know it is even possible to change the energy of struggle?

So here’s my challenge: Notice how you are feeling! Write your feelings down. Notice and record when you feel tense, anxious, irritable, unhappy. What are the circumstances and events that trigger those feelings? Don’t judge those feelings! Just take note and begin to watch for patterns that begin to emerge. Listen to your intuition and insights.

Also notice what makes you happy or brings you a sense of peace and serenity. Notice when you feel connected and aligned. What makes you laugh and what uplifts you?

Keep a journal or a daily notebook so that you can begin to connect the dots. Especially notice and keep track of the ways you feel about your finances and money. This is the area in which most people struggle the most! Notice all the ways you feel uncomfortable when you spend, or when you can’t spend. Identify the ways you feel conflicted about money in any way! Pay attention to the inner voices that “talk to you” about your money and write down the words.

Then join me April 3rd at 5:00 p.m. PT/ 6:00 p.m. MT/ 7:00 p.m. CT/ 8:00 p.m. ET for a free training call as we explore this subject more fully. To register for this free training class, click here to reserve your seat. Space is limited, so register early.

I look forward to “seeing” you there!

Next month, we will explore ways that you can begin to resolve and release the negative struggle programming that you’ve identified and are experiencing. It’s time to release the old, hidden struggle programs, so that you can easily and powerfully manifest your goals and dreams.

Here’s to the start of your journey to freedom from struggle. I can hardly wait to see what you create as you begin to release struggle and step into ease, flow and grace.